Celebrate

Today marks a half-decade since our relationship began… half of a decade…

It’s funny how we use big words to make time seem more impressive. In truth, I wasn’t any more prepared for where we are today five years ago than I was five months ago.

I don’t believe it is time that shapes our personalities and relationships but rather moments and circumstances. And yet, time is what is most often celebrated. We get together with friends and family over flaming sticks of wax stuck in baked goods and we celebrate time. The longer the period of time, especially if it’s a multiple of five, the bigger the celebration.

Another birthday, another anniversary, another year sober…

But if the quality of that time is poorly spent, the amount of time doesn’t really matter at all. Because people can relapse, marriages can be broken, and eventually everyone dies.

In a single moment, everything can change. Yes, you lived, stayed together, or stayed sober for some amount of time considered worthy of celebration… but did you do it well?

We should celebrate moments rather than just the time after them. We should celebrate every significant moment, good and bad, big and small. Celebrate the victories, but even more so the hardships as they make us stronger.

Let’s gather together over lit wax sticks stuck in baked goods to celebrate that pregnancy but also remember to celebrate the toddler who’s struggling to potty train. Celebrate your friend’s job promotion but also the layoff as it’s an opportunity for something new. Celebrate the wedding but also celebrate going to marriage counseling in order to make it last. Celebrate the addict who’s been sober for a year but also celebrate the addict who barely resisted relapsing last night but made it to a meeting today.

Celebrate the moments. For it is the moments your heart spent in celebration, not the amount of time that has passed, that you will remember when tragedy comes.